Margo Oxendine

Along with August, the hottest of the heat is gone. Sure, there will still be days someone like I might think are way too warm. Yet, the nights will be getting cooler.

And, as they say, that makes for “good sleeping weather.”

Ah, sleep. I love it! I’m discovering, though, that as we age, sleep becomes more of a challenge than it once was.

Remember our teen and college years? Were we ever allowed to sleep as long as we wished? No chance. There were classes and chores and later, a job we had to show up for. In my early 20s, I can’t count the number of days I just chucked getting up and going to work. That may be why none of my early jobs amounted to much, other than a couple stern talking-tos before I was fired. No matter. Waitressing and bartending and office typist jobs were easy to come by. And even easier to leave behind.

Remember staying up half the night, or longer? I recall one of my favorite youthful mottos: “Hold back the dawn!” Can’t count the number of days I ushered in without having been to bed.

Now, I see dawn on most mornings. It’s because I have gone to bed at 9 o’clock, and am up and at ’em by 5:30. Now, I actually find myself, during summer, wishing it would hurry up and get dark so I can go to bed.

Remember waking up, taking a bleary look around, and going right back to sleep for a few hours? Nowadays, once my eyes are open, they ain’t closing again. I’ve convinced myself I am happy to hobble out of bed at 5:30 or 6 so I can get a “jump” on the day. I love working in the earliest of hours. The phone does not ring.

Of course, by 2 o’clock or so, I am ready for just one thing: A nap. Gee, how I adore naps. They are one of modern man’s best inventions.

Remember being forced to “go down for a nap” when you were a kid? We hated naps! They interrupted play time. I would always grump into my room and mumble, “You may make me come in here, but you can’t make me go to sleep!”

Now, dropping off to sleep in the middle of the day is one of my favorite pastimes. I look forward to my naps. I’ve even developed a routine: Sit in chair. Read book. Nod off into a deep, delicious sleep. Wake myself up snoring. Eat a little candy.

Yes, I know that is one habit that comes from childhood. As soon as we got up from our naps, a nice little snack was waiting. I hated the naps, but loved the snacks.

These days, I find myself thinking, when I crawl out of bed before the crack of dawn, “That’s okay; I can always take a nap later.” And on those days when a nap is not in the schedule, I feel out of sorts and “put upon” somehow.

One key to a delightful nap in the mid-afternoon is this: Turn off the ringer on the phone. Because, even if the phone has not rung once all day, someone will undoubtedly decide to call you while you’re napping.

Then, your choices are these: Quickly mute the ringer and go back to sleep if you can. Or, answer and sound a bit groggy, wherein the bright-voiced caller has the gall to say, “Oh, did I wake you?” Of course, you must answer no. Heaven forbid people should know that you take a nap almost every day.

Another thing I find kind of funny is when someone calls at 10:30 in the morning and says, “I didn’t wake you up, did I?” Not at my age, you didn’t! And what business is it of yours, anyway?

I think the folks in Latin countries have the right idea: the siesta. Everything stops after a long, lavish lunch, and everyone takes a snooze. Shops are closed. Phones go unanswered. The hottest heat of the day passes them by as they snore under sombreros. Then they get up, probably have a little tostida, and commence to engage in commerce. After that, they can tango half the night away.

If you will excuse me, it is 2:30. My napping chair calls. As soon as I mute the ringer on the phone.  

To order Margo Oxendine’s A Party of One, email [email protected], or call 540-468-2147 Monday-Thursday from 9-5.